The Last Year: 365 1/4

It's been a whole year since I started this blog and I have to say the last year was perfect. I think the last year seems like how life should be.

I have never been more confused in my life,  yet more determined to see my dreams through.
I have never lost so many friends, yet somehow becoming closer to the few that matters.
I have never seen so many different sides to a person,  yet finding the qualities worth keeping.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE CONFUSED,  BUT YET SO SURE ABOUT WHAT I NEED FROM LIFE.

I have gotten so many job offers this year,  but somehow managed to settle into a familiar place.
I said goodbye to old roommates and welcome new ones that seems to fall right into place.
I said goodbye to old lovers, met new ones but somehow realized that this journey, that I am on,  I must go alone.

There have been a few regrets but they only motivates me!

For the first time in my life I know what it is I truly want.
I know which career path I will choose.
I know where I want to live.
I know what it is I want in a guy.

I now live to not compromise my morals and integrity.

So why do I feel so far away from it all? This is a strange feeling,  one that I DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN, but one that I am excited about. I feel like I finally hit the fork in the road at the crossroad, you know when you're stuck between a rock and a hard place? I have this overwhelming feeling that this is it and that everything is gonna fall into place right after this moment. There are these butterflies in my belly that I can't explain. It's a constant feeling of wanting to smile all day with this great dread. I feel relaxed and anxious. I can't seem to get rid of the butterflies. I don't want them to stop. I love the feeling of not knowing what's next.

I love it all. WISH ME LUCK.

I feel like this whole year, if it didn't teach  me much, it taught me how to let go and move on.
It taught me how to forgive and forget.
It taught  me that not every battle is mine to fight and that sometimes my place is in the bleachers cheering everyone else on.
It taught me to look at moments like these and enjoy them and not having to analyze them.
It taught me peace.

I am now living for myself and not vicariously through everyone's perception of me.
I am happy!

So whats next you might ask?

Life as it pertains to me.........

P.s. my computer was harmed in the making of this blog. LOL!
Niters!

And don't let the bed bugs bite!
Sleepless.