Vermont, BCF Style..........

So I went on a great trip up to Vermont this past weekend and it was a warm and jolly good time. This trip reminded me of better times and how quickly us younger folks take things for granted with all our whining and bulshitting around.

Camp!

How enjoyable life can be if we just let it. How great families can be if we don't rush to leave every time we go home.

After a seven hour drive and four states later, we arrived in Duxbury, Vermont at about 10:30pm. It was pitch black and we were guided by the moonlight and electric lights beaming from the houses. I knew I was gonna have a good time because there were no street lights to be found and honestly they were not needed. We got to the house at the bottom of the mountain and I was immediately greeted by Kate's mom and a big old bear hug. I then met Kate's cousin and she refused to shake my hand, because "in this family we hug". I felt right at home. We drove up the mountain to the cabin, which we all now coined as "Camp". The night air was fresh and I could only imagine what I was gonna wake up to the next morning. We got to the cabin and I was greeted with more smiles and hugs and beers and laughs and seeing as though we were all tired we all went to bed soon after.

Our weekend began...

Everything about summer in the mountains reminded me of the country area I grew up in in Jamaica, and for the first time in a long time I felt a sense of peace. Not just that peace that you hear people go on and on about when they are trying to convince someone that they are doing ok. I meant a genuine, just warm fuzzy feeling, that only true love can experience.

I woke up the next day to the sounds of laugher, and the smell of coffee and bacon and french toast. It felt like christmas morning and I couldn't wait to get out of bed, because we all knew if you are the last one out, then you get to open your present last. *Cough* Shelly. Lol.  The fresh mountain air was incredible and Moxie (Kate's dog) couldn't stop frolicking about and you know what?, I was right there with her.

We had a lovely Saturday. We sat around and told jokes and have some lovely cocktails, and our little six became seven at some point during the day. We drank some more and more joke telling. We went for a two hour hike along the creek and we picked berries and chatted and strolled and took in the sweet mountain air, and I got to know some of the most beautiful people that god have ever made. Reminded of my family and the only thing that could make this moment a little more special was to have them join me on the fun!

It's funny how you have friends for years and you wonder what it will be like when you finally meet the people responsible for raising them, and I have to tell you a lot of friendships have been broken up because of this. Your friends can be wonderful, but they can have some atrocious parents and family base. But not Kate. Her family is just the way you would imagine from hanging out with her, and a little bit more, with a lot of love oozing from their veins with a little blackberry and granola cobbler on top.

That was orgasmic btw....Great job Donna!!! And I'm gonna take this time to give a shout out to Auntie Kathy for the Salmon P. Wiggle. I had three servings.

We ended the night by playing a nice game of Phase 10. I mean I think I won, but the score sheet says otherwise, so I demand a rematch the next BCF weekend. I still don't know what BCF means ha ha. I think I was somewhere else when you guys came up with the name. Ummm!

Sunday came around and we all packed up our little belongings and boarded the pick up express and headed down the mountain and away from The Best Weekend in history. I challenge anyone who think they can top this weekend. But not before we took a tour, or somewhat of a tour, of the first Ben and Jerry's ice cream factory. Oh Vermont, just when I thought I was leaving you found a way to rope me back.

There are a bunch of things I got from this weekend: Thanks Shelly
A moose shed is not a small building.
You can't buy sparkling water at a water bar.
A scat is....well you guys may have to tune in to find that one out. But let's just say it could belong to a bear, a fox, a coyote or a deer.
Oh and Love, Johnny boy was right, All You Need Is Love!

One thing I know for sure is that when I have my own family I hope I have half the patience and love for them as I saw this weekend.

So I take my umbrella, kick off my flip flops and grab a cold one to a great bunch of folks I have had the pleasure of spending a weekend with. Here's to next year ladies. May we have more wines, wine coolers, beers, Salmon P. Wiggles and a jolly old good time.

Muah!

Sleepless

We Are United In Our Differences.....

Man today was one of those days and as I sit here sipping on my mango margarita I reflected and smiled.

I had one of those days that I thought was perfect! 

You try to decipher. 

Tuesday August 27, I got up at about 10:30am which is pretty early for me considering that I usually get up about 1pm if I am lucky and about 3pm if I really don't have to work. So that should have been a clue that it wasn't gonna be an easy day.

Ok fast forward to evening time and I was feeling relaxed. I knew I didn't have to work so I made plans with ma girl to go to yoga! Fun!

Now I should tell you that my phone has been dead since Monday seeing as though I left my charger at work on Sunday. I know I was gonna be in the city later so I would just get my charger then, right? 

There are two lessons to be learnt today and I got a full class. 

Lessen one:

I went to yoga and it was wonderful, got to work to get my charger and it was closed so I did what any normal being would do after a good yoga session and that was collected my charger and kept it moving. Got back to Daphnee's apartment because we were gonna have dinner and chat.  Charged my phone and the messages kept pouring in.

So something you have to know now, living in 2013, is that if you don't have your phone on you or if your phone is dead you are presumed dead to the rest of the world. So not only was Maya searching all over the place for me she started to Facebook message everyone that she knew in my life and have them searching for me. I was like what??? Why??? Really?? This is too much. Now you got the guy downstairs ringing my doorbell and shit? I mean it's just a day! but I guess shit happens right?

But I appreciated it and I hope you guys don't think this is my wolf moment and should anything happen to me for real no one will come a calling.

So lessen two:

Now on the way from the train to Daphnee's house she asked me why I was an activist for HIV. I literally told her why aren't we all activists? Ha ha that's the Jamaican in me, always answering a question with a question.

She then said I know,  but why HIV? (Daphnee likes to analyze things, so she will asked you a question and then follow that question up with a similar question as the first question to understand your answer) I told her because I think people are not talking about it enough and they feel that because now you can pop a pill and live longer, that it's not a death sentence anymore, but truly because of the stigmas and the hush hush about it, it's now becoming a life sentence. I told her if I can get one person asking me about one post or just liking one post I feel like I helped someone. 

Fast forward to her apartment and was checking my messages and low and behold I got a message from a friend and it goes a little something like this:

Do you have HIV?

Now that's all sorts of wrong. That is not the way you want to go about asking that question and I would have thought that people were aware of the 'other' groups of people such as myself that actually fight for things they believe in not because they are INFECTED but because they are AFFECTED. I know too many people with this disease, and when I try to educate myself about it, from their experiences, they know nothing of the sort, AND, they are living with it! So my goal is, if I can help myself and others from not being infected, and to open up the conversations and keep it flowing, then it will help in this epidemic in which there is no known cure, today and for the future. I mean I can go on and on about this, but honestly I am happy that I can trigger such reactions. 

Shouldn't we all be united in our differences AND, for our differences?

It's just like the time I was asked, again, on Facebook if I was a lesbian because of a similar post about human rights. I mean come on people grow up!  I am an activist for HUMAN RIGHTS! I don't have to be gay or have a certain disease to fight for something in a world where people are being discriminated against. I mean not long ago, because I am black, a lot of opportunities weren't afford to me, but because of people like me, today I can enjoy some luxury without having to worry if I will get beaten or lynched! 

Think about it. What are we waiting for to ACT UP? Say something so you can create a better world for the next generation!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wwhFS1mUaVY  How to survive a plague!

Stop talking about celebrities and their useless boring lives. I don't give a fuck. That's not why I am here, to help the fortunates? I am here to lend a voice to the ones who can't speak but wants to. My future children and their friends and the ones who have passed on and didn't get to finish their work. 

I mean it's all good and fine that I am been ask these questions, but I say do it in a forum that others can join in and not a private message. I don't care if you think I am gay or have every diseases known to man. My goal is to get you talking and to keep you talking and I have to say the mission is slowly being accomplished.

Be blessed, I love you! Sat Nam!

Sleepless

Something about just knowing when its right...............

I believe in soul mates.

Call me crazy.


I believe that there is one person out there for everyone. Will everyone get to meet that person? Sure, at some point in their lives, whether they get together or not. Are they always destined to stay together? Not really, because one person's soulmate can be someone else's  husband or wife. There's a great wonderment that happens, when expectations meets reality. Its never always as how we think. Expectations are how we perceive a situation is going to be. Reality is what happens when we are busy expecting the perceived outcome.

I have a theory and it might be true. I believe everyone gets to meet their soulmate at some point. I believe it does happen and we always know.

I know a story of this lady who was in a kinda sorta relationship with this guy when he had to move pretty much halfway across the country. They were destined to make it work, but as we all know long distance relationships are never possible, and the ones that do make it are exceptions not the rules. So anyways she happened to be on the train one morning and for some reason the train stops. A stranger started to exchange small talks with her and she spoke back to him lightly as not to be rude. The train started, she rushed off but not before the stranger asked for her number, to which she gave him her business card and got off the train, not really thinking much of it. She went on to visit her so-called boyfriend all the way across the country. He was doing well and she was doing well. Weeks later she had to leave work early because of an emergency. This usually never happens. She was on the platform getting off  the train, when she spotted the stranger on the other side. He waved and they continued with their evenings. It was not until the third time they ran into each other that he finally asked her out. She accepted because she was trying to give something else a chance for once. He was usually not her type and when they went to dinner they  had a great time so much so that she called the long distance boyfriend and called it quits. They are married today, That was about five years ago. The funny thing about how this all came about. She asked her now husband why he didn't call her after the first meeting. He told her that he thought she was trying to brush him off by giving him her card. She told him she was late for work because of the train and she was just trying to get out of the train at her destination. She also asked him why he didn't come after her on the platform. He said he didn't want to seem weird or like a stalker. The he said, "Did you know we were gonna get married when we met?" She said, "No, I was dating someone at the time who was completely my type, but was living all the way across the country and I actually was seeing him at the time of our first date."  She said, "why, did you?" He said, "Yes! From the very moment I saw you on the train." She told me the story and you can tell that they are still in love. Don't we all wish we can have these rom com moments? They do exist but you have to be a romantic, gullible fool, who is willing to believe.

I believe!

Then there are stories like this.

I know another lady who thought she had met the love of her life, over some ten years plus. The one thing was he was in a committed relationship. This said woman was so sure of it that even when the guy got married she kept in touch because she has never felt this way about any guy before.Well anyone for that matter. Was this love? Are they soul mates? I am not quite sure. I also believe that there is such a thing called unrequited love. This is when one person is completely enamored with another, whom will not return such a love. This is very tricky and it can make you feel like this is your true love and that one day he/she will wake up and realized all the things that you knew all along. This is the making of a bad rom com and usually you get so build up on the friendship road that you waste most of your flirting days pining away for someone who is never gonna love you, and even if you finally get together. You were always their second or third choice. That is not cool and shouldn't be practiced. But to each their own.

They say when you meet the ONE you will know. You will just know!

No one can really describe that moment, but you can always tell the people who are spending the rest of their days with their soul mates. I read this thing once a long time ago. I don't quite remember where I got it from but it always stuck with me. It said, marry someone you have great conversations with, because when you are older that's all you have to look forward to. I'm not quite sure how I feel about that now. That was all fine and deep when I was in my twenties. But now I am in my Thirties I want it all. I want the passion, the conversations, the fun, the excitement, the sports lover, the music lover, the quiet times, the sensitivity, the emotions, the physicality, the father, the husband, the human, THE MAN!. I want it all. I have waited this long and not settling so I think I deserve it. Well at least that's what my oldest sister wish for me and you know what, she is mostly never wrong.

So how do you spot your soulmate? I say you don't, you will just know when the time is right.

We were at a restaurant the other day and the owner proceeded to come over to tell us a cute story. I don't know, maybe he was drunk, or maybe we look like the kinds of people in need of a cute story.
He said he was out one night and he met this girl from South Korea.  Now he was from South Africa. He said she actually told  him that he was going to be her husband and he thought that was strange given that one, she was Asian and two, women don't usually speak like that, well, not to him at least. But fours years later they are engaged. He seems to be happy and again I wasn't quite sure why he felt the need to share that story with us, but what I am trying to say is that when you know you know.  It's like that feeling you get after seeing an ex and you know you are over him/her when you can look at that person and think to yourself. "Eww I had sex with you, what was I thinking?

There's something about knowing when it's right!

I am a hopeless romantic and I like it that way. I am that person that will jump over the moon for love if my heart tells me to. This is why I take my time with love, because I am trusting that when I know I will know and because there is no need to hurry when I am making up my mind.

As rainy as it is now,
Sleepless.

iF yoU 'see' Kay You!

Now the world don't move to the beat of just one drum and why should it? I learned a long time ago that if all the birds in the forest were to be singing, then what a dull forest that would be. People should be themselves no matter what. So why is it that we live in societies where everything that makes us individuals and humans are shunned? Who came up with this concept and why is it still going on?


I hate hate, even though at times I wish I could hate the law makers. They are such bulshiters and nobody breaks the law more than the people who burn sweat and tears to implement them. Now don't get me wrong, I am all for rules and guidelines, but that's all they should be, GUIDELINES, not a basis to dictate how a person should live. I get really hot blooded about this whole marriage act and marriage equality thing. Why is this even an issue to begin with? I am in awe that a country who's  motto is in God we trust, is doing everything furthest from. If you really trust in God, then you would know that not one of the ten commandments say anything about abolishing the equal rights of humans. I should know I own a bible. Be careful, Thou shall not take the name of the lord in vain, because God will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain.

I am all for same-sex love, hetero love, animal love, because as long as we are loving that's all that should matter, right? Why shouldn't we take love over any other thing any other day? Why are we shunning some love and accepting some? Where does it say that in your bible? My bible clearly states that we should love everyone as we love ourselves. So in all fairness, it is safe to say that the people who are so gung ho on abolishing any form of love other than "straight" love, hate themselves?  Isn't. That. Just. Sad? Isn't that the problem and shouldn't that be the issue we focus on, as oppose to telling two tax paying, law abiding citizens that it is illegal for them to show their true colors, so to speak, in public?

Such Bulshit!

I mean, if we are gonna hate, how about we hate the people who think guns should be legal? How about them coo coo ca choos? What sane person would still be all about guns after all the damages it caused? I say, if we went all the way back, waaaay before guns were even thought of, and silence the first guy, cause I am sure it was a guy, who came up with the idea to let's make a gun, so many innocent lives would still be here today, and we would have to come up with a better solution to punish the people who wronged us, so to speak. Yea why are the Lawmakers so vocal about sticking with the guns, but they can't come up with a simple solution to Immigration? Is this even plausible, that you would look at a nation, that WAS founded upon immigration, that wouldn't even BE a nation if it wasn't for immigration, to tell others that, "Well see the thing is, say, now that we are here, say, you are not welcome here, say."

No seriously, such BULSHIT!

Oh and all the starving kids in the world, why IS it such a fucking hassle to adopt a kid to give them a good home? See I get the point that if I take your kid, and raise that kid, you can't or don't get to come back and just take that kid. I get that part. But isn't a quick sign off of papers enough? Why all the bulshit back stories? And don't even get me started on mothers who can't even take care of their kids, but get racist or bigoted when a gay couple wants to adopt. I mean if you can't get it together to raise your child, the one you enjoyed sex to have, the last thing you need to be is racist. Because clearly you fornicated and the last time I checked, that is also a no no in the bible.

I mean, come on people get it together! Stop all the BULSHIT and just love one another. How come I got that from the bible and you guys didn't? Oh, I see, I got the special edition, and there was only one copy and it was in my house?

Gosh.....

And while I am venting, Fox News, really! Really?

As always,
Sleepless.

Are we there yet?

What is it really we search for in life? Are people truly happy? If so is it available for everyone or just a few?

I often asked myself these questions while I am trotting to the subway, or if I am walking through a park, or just sitting in my window looking out on the different kinds of people going about their lives and living. I mean it may sound like I am trying to be deep or come up with a deeper solution to something I  want to manifest, but honestly I am really curious as to what the answers to these questions might be.

Are we there yet?

I often wonder if the people who professed their love on social medias are the happiest or is it the ones who are busy being in love and trapped in their heavenly bliss, evolving, enjoying, grasping onto that every moment? I am sure it's the latter.

Are we there yet?

I often remembered that when I am having such a feeling. The feeling of being utterly in love.  I am always too engulfed in it to even notice anything else. I could be on fire and wouldn't even care because it's moments like those you know you have lived, if the thought of dying would satisfy you.

Are we there yet?

I was having a conversation the other day with my sister. One of many conversations that we have had a million times and one of which I will soon to have, again. This is the one conversation every coupled women feel the need to have with every single women. This is usually the question to which they think you are the one in control of your love destiny, and if you will yourself enough, you will magically find someone perfect for you. As if to say the person that they are with is perfect for them and if that is the case then I AM REALLY HAPPY FOR YOU! Yes this is the conversation that I am sure every single gal, in every singles bar, asked themselves, on every single drunken nights. The never ending conversations as if to say this is the key to true happiness and even if it is, are we suppose to be forced into it? It's like that damn question "what comes first, the chicken or the egg?" My question for those questions is, who the fuck cares?

Are we there yet?

Yes the ever so stupid question, that I am sure single men don't get quite as much, because quite frankly it is always assumed that when a guy is ready he will just produce a mate for better or for worst.

Are we there yet?

When are you gonna try to find somebody to settle down with? When are you gonna settle into a relationship? Don't you want to get married? Soon you will be old and alone blah blah blah blah blahs!!!!!!!

Really? Really? Are we there yet?

Now honestly I think there is always something wrong with the concept of just settling. I was never a big fan of the word, hence I tend to run away from it. Kinda back to my question, is it what that is? Are most people just settling into a life? Is it why we are mostly so unhappy? Is that why we produce such unhappy offsprings? Is it me or are our children now becoming murderers before they even move out of the house? Is this the result of settling? Are we mass producing a generation of settlers? Is it ever gonna stop? When is it gonna stop?

ARE WE THERE YET?

I made a promise to myself along time ago, a promise that I hold dear to my heart. Its kinda like that old saying "if you hate your job, quit." And so on and so forth. If you hate your life, quit. Stop meddling in mine because until I am there, and fully there, I am gonna be right here just being!

As Always,
Sleeples.