....While others should come with a manual

So I was having a conversation yesterday with my friend Cameca and we got on the topic of how tired we were of assuming that people should just know how to behave without someone having to tell them. I mean, after all, we are all grown folks and grown folks should know how to behave, right? Well that is, in most cases, not the situation. I have come to learn that there are only a few people left in the world that are like me.(People who do not need instructions to know how to behave). Everyone else should come with a manual. It's quite annoying frankly if you ask me. People should know how to behave without having someone telling them how to.

This is true, so a few months ago I took on a new roommate. Now I am pretty easy to live with because I am usually never home and if I am, I'm usually in my bedroom. So on a given day I went a wondering into the kitchen because the stars were aligned and I felt like making myself a meal. What befell me was atrocious to say the least. There were rice everywhere. When I said something to said roommate, well the convo went like this.

Me: Roommate, did I mention that we live above a restaurant and that a few summers ago we had a mice problem that I wouldn't want a repeat of? (I mean after all we do live in NYC)

Roommate: Yes but I thought that was ages ago.

Me: Yes but this is NYC city and it doesn't take much for mice to get into your apt and take over so we have to keep the apt very clean.

Roommate: But I thought mice only stayed in the cupboard, I didn't know they come into the sink?

I looked at her and walked to my room. I'm sorry I don't care if you were trapped in the South Pole for decades, you know that mice will go anywhere they please. After all they are probably the only animals that can fit into any space. Now she needs a manual, and if this was the case I would have skipped ahead to chapter three to know that in case of a mice problem she would think they were confined to cupboards and then I would know that she couldn't be my new roommate and that would save both of us a lot of time and trouble.

Now I'm not saying that in other situations she is not the person to call I'm just saying she needs a manual.

Another group of people who need manuals are the ones who touch you because they think its cool, like say the people who just touch a pregnant lady's belly without knowing them or white people who touches black people hair because they think its cool. They always say if I were black I would wear my hair as an Afro.  Well I'm sorry,  how would you like it if I touch your hair because IT IS different from mine. I wouldn't, because I know better than to touch dirty things. Yes it doesn't matter who you are, the hair of any human being is a DIRTY thing. It is always exposed and just out there. Also about that Afro thing, lets just say if I were white, I wouldn't spend umpteen of times straightening my 'curls' or dying my hair blonde because I didn't like being a brunette or that dumb statement about Blondes having more fun! That's just retarded, the best way to have the most fun is to just be yourself. DUH!  What I am trying to say is the grass is always greener no matter who we are, so give it a rest. And Man, do I have to walk around with superglue in my hair? I'm just saying!

OK, the next group of manual holders are people who over stay their welcome. If you're reading this then you are like me. I am a generous person, I like to give freely, but I realized that there are some people that you absolutely can't let into an inch of your world. This is so because you will learn the hard way that your freedom will be no longer yours and now you have to share your space, literally, with them and everyone else in their life. This will end up sucking for you and frankly the only thing that should suck is a blowjob. Get it? ha ha. Anyways, there are some people that you give an inch and they take the whole nine yards. This is really true for the people who ask to spend two nights at your place and then two weeks later you have a roommate who not only is sharing your space but is also drinking  your milk, using your towel, body wash, body oil (and its not even in the bathroom), and if you try to have a rational conversation with them they get upset. Like you are the one all up in their space and you start thinking maybe you need to move out. FUCK THOSE PEOPLE! They are takers and they prey on the giving. They especially need a manual and should have it on them at all times.

People who are prone to be messy needs a manual.

People who shows up to a birthday party dinner and refuse to split the check should have a manual and no friends.

People who likes to borrow money and say they are gonna pay you back tomorrow because 'you know they are good for it' then three months later they still owe you $40. Need a manual and a dose of ex-lax.

People who only likes to talk about their break ups or are constantly asking you why they don't have a boyfriend, definitely needs an instructional manual on how to get a vibrator and a life!

People who uses the words 'whatevs', 'cray', 'bestie', 'bff', and verbally say 'btw', should have their own set of rules on 'how to operate in the real world' manual. 

OH. EM. GEE!!! People who literally do not know how to behave on the subway. I'm sorry but I am on my way to work how about you do the same and stop panhandling me, chewing your gum in my ear, playing your loud music and smelling so bad.  Manual!!!

I'm not mad in fact I am the opposite right now. I am laughing my ass off of how weird grown ass people can be and if anything a little sad for them. I find it necessary to remind everyone that we all have traits like these and if you don't find anything wrong with any of these pointers, then you my friend needs a big ol' manual. 

Ha ha ha!

As always,

Sleepless.

Meet: T B (TWO YEARS!!!)

It just dawned on me today that it's been two years since I started this blog and even though I have had a busy, somewhat uninspiring year, I decided to celebrate the two year anniversary of this glorious blog by telling you guys a lil about the person behind the blog....ME!!!!!
And, what better way than to answer a few of the questions in the Meet: Section ®. I think it's gonna be great, but then again why wouldn't it be?


Anyways here we go......

Name: Tani B

Age : 33

Status: Extremely Single

Zodiac Sign: Aries

What do you do: Bartender/Writer/Actor

Hail From: St Elizabeth/ Negril, Jamaica

Where Ya Bed At: Clinton Hill

Why NYC: It is the most wonderful place on earth, where dreams do come true if you can find the time to sleep.

Best Place To Eat In The City: This is way too hard. I love Jamaican food. I would have to say Jamaican wise, still my kitchen. Virginia's on Avenue C and 11th is pretty good. Colonia Verde In Fort Green, Locanda Vini & Olii, Clinton Hill and of course Babuji for Indian Food.

When's Bedtime: These days it's usually when I get under the covers

What's The One Thing You Have With You At All Times: Chapstick

How Old Would You Be If You Didn't Know How Old You Are: I am sticking with 30.

If Happiness Was The National Currency, What Kind Of Work Would Make You Rich: Traveling and writing, Acting and Volunteering with HIV/AIDS all around the world. Educating people on discrimination.

Would You Break The Law To Save A Loved One: I would break the law to save anyone. Laws are made by humans who also makes mistakes.

A Sucker For:  Birthdays, Christmas, Falling in love and a good whiskey.

Next 3 Years:  Hopefully I would have at some point been to Australia, successfully publish something and finish my screenplay.

What Is Your Greatest Fear: Falling in love. This wall that I created as a self preservation mechanism has become too hard to break down.

If You Could Tell The World One Thing: There is really no point to life, but every once in a while you get to eat candy and have sex and then it all seems right, so quit trying to fix things and just live!

Favorite Thing You Have Ever Done With A Friend: Camping in the mountains away from technology and stress

Where Are You Going To Be When You Die: Sitting on the dock of the bay wasting time.

If You Could Have Sex With One Person Past Or Present: My Lover!

If You CoulD Only Have Dinner With Three People For The Rest Of Your Life, Whom: One Family member, one friend and my soulmate.

Worst Thing About The City: "It's Showtime" on the subway!

So there you have it. Its been a roller coaster two years, but I loved every minute of it. There were days when I wish it would be Mondays forever.  Happy two years EVERYONE. I say a Big Thank You and keep on reading.

As always,
Sleepless

Summer is much funner when its cool out....

So hey there, yes summer is almost here and we have a lot of things to do. Summer in NYC is probably some of the best times of the year for everyone, and what better way to celebrate this than with the best health ever? Yea yea yea I know this has been said and done before but I must say not by me. I remember the last time I exercised was when I was 18, yea I'm not that proud either but, hey, life happens.

So I started a new schedule which is gonna involve some exercising. I planned on toning up and getting fit and doing all the things needed to stay healthy and alert, trust me in my line of work I need it.

I have decided to follow some simple rules to a better living.


I happen to be reading a magazine at work the other day (yes I read them too once in a while) and I came across some pointers from Bob Harper. Things that are pretty doable, seeing as though I am not an exercise enthusiast and want to stay fit with as little pressure and pain as possible. I think this might just work and I'm gonna stick with this for the next month and if I see results then maybe, and a very big MAYBE, I will stick to a health plan. I mean, I am getting closer to the hump.lol. 35 i.e.


By Bob Harper

1) Drink a large glass of water first thing in the morning and before every meal. No excuses. It helps digestion and metabolism and its great for your skin.

2) Eat lean protein at every meal (fish, chicken, eggs). Eggs are quick and easy. I have to say that I did this yesterday and I was starving afterward, but I gotta stay focused.

3)Dedicate one day a week to "meatless day"-no animal protein whatsoever. Focus on having more greens, you're never going to gain weigh from eating vegetables.

4)Go to bed hungry (ok ok so I have to admit that this is gonna be the one that sucks the most seeing as though I love to eat right before I sleep. Its just something that I've grown accustom to. It gives me great joy). Get on a routine so you don't have any food in your system at least three hours before you hit the sack. After five hours your body will burn its own fat and sugar. Yay! I guess.

5) Eat berries and apples everyday. APPLES URGH! They are high in fibers and antioxidants. The more fiber you eat, the more satisfied your body will be.


So there you have it folks, I am gonna do the amazing. Something I haven't done in over 15 years. Wish me luck and I will post pictures and keep you guys updated on the progress. Lets see what this body can do come June 30, yea I did start a few days ago.

Nite! And remember go to bed hungry, ha ha ha
Sleepless.

Meet: Nana Mensah

Today was an exceptionally beautiful day I quickly noted to myself as I got out of the creepy Subway stop at East Broadway off the F. I noticed this, as I was heading towards Essex, where I was gonna meet up with the lovely Nana Mensah. Yes, there was a park to my right and the little cafe, Cafe Grumpy, that was close to her apt and it had the most amazing chocolate chip cookies and ginger teas. Yes, I was in the lower east side and as I eagerly waited for Nana, I sipped on my tea. I mean, I was running a lil behind, as usual, and I was happy and excited as I saw Nana approaching with her big bundle of love (dog), Pavlov. She quickly hurried upstairs to put him down so we could chat.

I must tell you folks that I met Nana little under a year through a mutual friend, and if the world wasn't small enough, Nana is also a friend and did quite the acting  with also another really close friend of mine, so when Nedra told me that she ran into Nana on the street, I knew I wanted to do this article on her, seeing as though Nedra only sings the praises of people she truly believes in. Nana is quite the beauty, she is a free spirit that loves life and wears it well. She is not afraid to speak up on the things she believes in, actually she is not afraid to speak at all, lol. She loves to travel and and has a special love in her heart for Paris. She speaks french.


We headed across the street, to the park, with our coffee (Nana had an iced coffee) and tea (me the ginger) and we got to chatting. We talk about everything and nothing. Turns out that we had so much in common and before we knew it we had places to go and people to meet. Nana had tickets to a show and me well, Brooklyn to have dinner with Daphnee, but not before we hit up Verlaine for happy hour. They have the most amazing lychee martinis for $5, so we had two and ended the afternoon heading into opposite directions.

Nedra Gallegos : "Nana is cool, man. She is really awesome. I remember when they were gonna cut the jobs of a few people at HAI, she got a grant so that everyone could keep their job, all by herself, really awesome!"

Wow, just from talking with her I am not sure if there isn't anything this lady can't do. But I could ramble all day so,

Come on, let's meet Nana,


Name: Melissa Nana Afua Nyarko-Abronomaa Mensah. Miss Jackson if you’re nasty!

Age: 28 going on 29. (Total nerd moment, but this phrase always makes me chuckle—aren’t you always ‘x’ going on ‘x +1’? Isn't it redundant? Some people say "Oh, she's 13 going on 30", which is a pointless phrase and an even worse Jennifer Garner movie.)

Status: Low

Zodiac Sign: Virgo.

Job: That would be jobs plural. I’m a multi-hyphenate actor/writer/producer and to fund these various projects I write grants at the fantastic non-profit, HAI (hainyc.org). I also work at a trendy downtown restaurant. I won’t tell you which one so you can’t hit me up for a reservation.

Hail from: Avon, Connecticut by way of Ghana, West Africa.

Where ya bed at: LES all day errday

Why NYC: I was just asking myself the same question.

Best place to eat in the city: Depends on what you’re in the mood for—Highlands in the West Village is an older favorite. I love Whitehall, by the same owners. I love the $1 for 4 dumplings special at Vanessa’s Dumplings on Eldridge Street if I’m feeling fancy. Per Se if I’m feeling, you know, casual.

                                                                 Cafe Grumpy


 When's bedtime: Either 12:00am or 6:00am invariably.

What's the one thing you have to have with you at all times: A light grip on my sanity and Chapstick.

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are: 45

If life is so short, what would you rather spend your days doing: Traveling by boat, train, or automobile. Eating. Drinking. Worshiping someone and allowing myself to be worshiped by them.

Which loved one would you break the law to save: Any one of them! My admiration is freely given, but my love is hard to earn; once you’re in, you’re in and I will do anything for you.

Tell me about acting and theater: I started acting like a sane person in the late 1980’s in order to keep friends and not be excluded at the lunch table. I quickly got wise and realized I needed a creative outlet to excise demons, and I gravitated to the stage (I’m a shitty painter). I then realized that I hate collaborating and most people, so I started to write, because you can do it alone. I vacillate between wanting to throw my belongings in the back of a car (that someone else would be driving) and go live in solitude on a ranch in Montana—riding horses, building fires and smoking hand rolled cigarettes for the rest of my days—and needing the throbbing pulse of the metropolis. Acting and writing represent that yin and yang to me.

Next 3 years: Oh goodness, I have no idea what the next three years will involve. I will definitely be traveling to the following countries: Ghana, UK, France, UAE, Jordan, India, Singapore, Spain, Hong Kong and Los Angeles. Yes, Los Angeles. I will write and write and write and write. I will make a movie. I will struggle less and work out more. I will consume copious amounts of champagne and oysters. I will be promoted, hired and fired. I will buy higher thread count sheets and new light fixtures for my apartment. I can tell you what the next three years will not involve: marriage, mortgage, or sonograms.

What is your greatest fear: Failure.

What is your greatest fear: Success.

Cats or Dogs, Boxers or briefs: Dogs certainly, cats freak me out. I prefer briefs, but for some reason I feel like a pederast admitting as much. So let’s go with boxer-briefs.

Favorite thing you have ever done with a friend: Having a five-hour lunch on a grey spring day. Ambling (read bumbling) aimlessly in various cities in various countries.

Where are you gonna be when you die: Probably France. Or Africa (east or west, I’m not sure). I presume I’ll be in my 50s, but that’s due primarily to my colossal lack of imagination as I can’t see myself any older. Something interesting I heard: my beloved cousin once told me that we celebrate our birthdays every year with grand occasion, but every year our death day passes as well, unbeknownst to us until that last moment. Freaky. I think she’s a little depressed.

If you could have sex with one person past or present: My mind usually needs seducing before my body, and in that vein I have a deep-seated thing for political commentators. First up, Bill Maher. Definitely, definitely Bill Maher. Word on the street is that he loves black women and the streets don’t lie.

Secondly, Rachel Maddow. In this instance the sex act itself would come second to post-coital stroking of my hair and reading poems by Auden to me in front of a crackling fire in our rambling farmhouse in bucolic Western Massachusetts. But I haven’t really given it much thought.

 If you could only have dinner with three people for the rest of your life, who: It kinda looks like The Big Chill, but without Alex’s suicide. I’m not totally sure who the three people are, but the dinner would be at my home in my dining room, eating a meal prepared by me and my best loved ones surrounding my custom-designed table from BDDW. Good food/wine, good friends and good design—the holy trinity as far as I’m concerned.

Worst thing about the city: The people.

So there you have it people. This is a lil piece of what's in store for Nana, she is definitely one to look out for. Whether she is saving jobs or acting her butt off, she is taking the world buy storm and  taking no names, well maybe a few.

as always.
Sleepless.

Meet: Daphnee Allen

There's only two people that I know who actually knew what they would grow up to be Jr and Daphnee. Daphnee knew she wanted to be in marketing for a big beauty brand company and she knew she wanted to be in New York City for that. So with a month to find an apartment, (its official, she is, finally, moving outta Queens, ha ha) I interviewed Daphnee about how its going so far. I have to tell you guys that I knew Daphnee since college, but we were never friends just a hello here and there. We only became dear friends a few years ago when we decided to brave New York City together. This was an experience that has been changing my life ever since and whenever I check in with Daphnee she seems to be going through the same changes, just living and loving the city.

Daphnee was always the girl who sends out holiday wishes to my hotmail account. She is prolly one of the most honest and caring individual I know. She will give her soul for the people she loves and  she never had a bad thing to say about anyone, well unless you are a guy, then, well "guys are just stupid". This is clearly her favorite sentence about the opposite sex. lol. She is one of the most hard working individual and her beauty extends throughout her whole system. She is kinda a big deal. She is one of those people that you can honestly say, is beautiful on the inside and gorgeous on the outside, as well. She makes me so proud of her everyday. It is like watching a river cascading into a waterfall and if you ever get the chance to have a chat with her, it is gonna be worth it. She will not only win over your heart but she will cherish your worth, forever.

Daphnee was totally on the basketball team in college. Go Bucs!!!

Come on, lets get to know her.....

Name: Daphnee Allen

Age: 30 :D

Status: SINGLE!!

Zodiac Sign: Capricorn

What do you do: Marketing for a beauty company - brand: Sally Hansen

Hail from: France

Where ya bed at: Clinton Hill

Why Nyc: Dream City - I set foot in NYC the first time when I was 14, I think. The energy I felt was unparalleled, I had never felt such a great, inner voice of wanting to be somewhere so badly. I knew I was eventually going to live in the great new york city... and that happened almost 4 years ago, the dream came true!!!

Best Place to eat in the city: West village - I love turning the corners of those gorgeous little streets, and finding amazing, adorable restaurants with delicious food.

When's bedtime: 10.30 ish (sometimes earlier) during the week - I'm getting old. Weekends are different, minimum 2am when I am out and about.

One thing you have to have with you at all times: Cell phone, I'm a phone person, and love to stay in touch with my friends through text or call...

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are: 30 :D - I feel like my 20's were such a challenging chapter in my life, and even though very cliche, I told myself I was turning that page and opening a new door of success and happiness at 30.

If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich: World traveler - I love traveling, eating different foods, meeting new people from different cultures, and being in amazing, magical foreign places... I would just do that my whole life if I could.

Would you break the law to save a love: Yes - all my friends and family know that I would do anything for them.

Next 3 years: Happy, probably still in NYC, but who knows... I see myself growing more, and reaching career goals (marketing manager minimum) as well as personal goals.

Has your greatest fear ever came true: I think so... I want to live my life without fearing but risking situations and things and trying to live fully. My greatest fear would be if airplanes do not exist anymore, not allowing people to see the world - I don't think I will get to experience that in my lifetime ;-)

If you could tell the world one thing: Let's love each other, makes everything much simpler! I believe that positive vibes and love make all things just be.

Favorite thing you have ever done with a friend: Travel together - every time I have the opportunity to spend time with friends, especially abroad, it's like reliving our friendship again, enjoying all new things around. I did that last year in Italy with 2 great friends: Deniz from Istanbul, and Nathalie from Paris.

Where are you gonna be when you die: No idea - I don't want to think about that specific event.

If you could have sex with one person past or present: I really don't know.

If you could only have dinner with three people for the rest of your life: I would have picked my family members, but then again when I go home for a week, I'm annoyed, so rest of life, probably not! if it's that long, I would want to have dinner with the person I will eventually be in love with, and with 2 other great friends of my life (rotating, cause I have a few)... if I end up having kids, which I hope, I would want them at the table.

                                                   Daphnee 2008

                                                    Daphnee, 2012

So there you have it. Look out  for her, this ones a star on the rise..

as always,

Sleepless.

eight for eight months and the fascinators!!!!!

I have two fantastic ideas that just hit me and that I would like to share with y'all. I am so excited I could burst, but I wont.

Firstly,

          So I tend bar in this wonderful city and it's no surprise that I come across some very fascinating people that I get the chance to meet everyday, and what better way to let you guys in on the secret but to interview them and see where it goes. I like to call this little segment "Fascinating New Yorkers between 25 and 35 years". These years are the best years to be apart of this city, while still figuring what you want in life or what should be happening to your life, as a matter of fact.

I am just so excited to meet these people, as much as I am to share them with y'all. So let me take you on a journey into the lives of people who share the subway with us, have lunch with us, shop at the same market with us and people who is also a stranger to us and maybe next time when we SEE them,  they will be more than just a face in the crowd.

Secondly,

     It was just brought to my attention that there is only eight more months left in the year. EIGHT!!!! YIKES! So much to accomplish and I am right on schedule with a lil free time to spare, SO,  this is where the fun part begins. Over the course of the next eight months, I am gonna engage in a dare with myself. Yes, a DARE. With this dare, I will challenge myself to do eight things that I have always wanted to do but never had the courage or time, prolly mostly courage. So yes I can feel the pit of my belly even as I say this. I am a little scared but liberation will be mine. So join me as I take on a whole new adventure in this wonderful life. After all, if you are not living on the edge then you are taking up waaaaay too much space.

Tune in and enjoy,
as always,
Sleepless.

 

Here's to us, Here's to love......

Some moments are just perfect and life seems to be just fine and I found myself in such a moment on March 23, 2012. Yes my birthday.

 Listen, it hadn't been a great week. I was kicked in the gut by love again, and I wasn't quite ready to self-loathed, but also wasn't quite ready to get over it. So I took a trip with Chrissy and we headed to Ilion/The Adirondacks for a few days. This was amazing and the stars were aligned because with this trip came wisdom and serenity and the bonding of new and old friends and meeting amazing women that you can only read about and will only meet in the moments, where life is at a crossroad and when things seems to make no sense.

So we took a trip. It was great. We headed out at 8 am, and even though we were only coping on a mere two hours of sleep, nothing could stop Chrissy and I. We were happy, not even that obnoxious lady on the train or that big girl in the line who gave us the wrong info or the horse peeing and walking in the street. We were taking a break from the city and nothing could ruin that. We thought for sure we would be passed out as soon as the bus started moving, but to our surprise, we didn't catch a wink until later that night when we were safely tuck within the blankets of the house we stayed in, and we slept. Tuesday we took a trip into Utica where we not only took a  tour of Chrissy's old Alma Mater ( The Munson-Williams-Practor) but we also catch a tour of the Munson Mansion which was very historic but also tragic in a way. Wednesday we made our way up to the Adirondacks. This place is fucking amazing and it was just so fresh and peaceful. I loved every moment of it, especially when we spent about an hour by the river just watching the ice blocks float on by. BLISS!

Ok so back to the issue at hand. My birthday. I was perfect. It was perfect. It was just a gathering for the people I wanted to be there, and so the invitations were sent out as such. I wanted to make sure, that on this perfect day, no drama was to be had and that it was. We went, we ate and we chatted and we drank and we ate some more.  We did a little dance and got down some. It is moments like these I feel the most alive, like an invincible being. There was nothing outrageously done, but there were smiles and laughter and great conversations. What more can a 33 year old ask for? I say not a damn thing, but to have this much love surrounding me for the whole year and the rest as a matter of fact. And for those who couldn't be there, I aint mad atcha, We will catch up soon. All I wanna say is, when you find good company in life cherish it.

   I will leave you guys with one of the best birthday wishes of all times.
               "Wish you JOY, the one I recognized two years ago sitting next to you.
                 LOVE which is usually somewhere close, but that bitch can't hide too long.
                   HEALTH so you could drink longer.
                   MONEY to buy a ticket to Europe and be my guest!
Lovely, crazy Taniesha - most of all, I wish you more moments like those on the rooftop. So, visit me!"

                                                    Thanks Nevena. I cried!

Love, peace and happiness and 'til we meet again. Sleep well!
Sleepless.

No Woman, No cry.....Don't Shed No Tears!

It is taking so much of me to say this. But I feel if I don't, then I'm not gonna be well.

It's been awhile and I am completely broken. I have been trying to be well.

I NEED to be well.

How can I be honest, without being angry or feeling remorse?
How can I be honest, and wanting freedom the most?
How can I be honest, and let you know this is not FOR you?
How can I be honest, and let you know this is true?

Set me free!

I am beginning to realize just how good it feels to feel. I'm finally getting there. I honestly want you to know that this has EVERYTHING to do with you, and I need your help to get ME there.

How can I be honest? How do I get to say these words?
How can I just be honest, and have you not interrupt me?
How can I just be honest, and have you show me you care to hear?
How can I be honest and be free?
How can I be honest and have YOU set me free?
How can I be honest and have no regrets?
How can I be honest?......

...Goodbye!

As always and forever,
Sleepless.

In Honor Of WORLD AIDS DAY. December 1.

Yeah, yeah I know I am a little late, but what can I say a girl's been busy. I was recently educating myself, as always, on the interweb and came across some very useful info that I want to share with y'all. I am not big on plagiarizing but I thought if I sendthebody.com you to the website you would simply not go. So I brought the information to you.

This article I found on thebody.com Quite an interesting page. Anyways, here goes:

10 Common Fears About HIV Transmission:

10. Swimming in a Pool

You'd be amazed how many people write to our experts worried about HIV entering their bodies via blood or urine in a pool. HIV is not transmitted through water, period -- it doesn't matter whether you're standing in it, bathing in it or drinking gallons of it. (That also goes for hot tubs, showers, the sink at the gas station -- you name it!)

9. Coughing or Sneezing

Many people still find danger in simply being in the vicinity of someone who is HIV positive. But there's no need to be afraid of being near people with HIV!
HIV is not an airborne disease and cannot be transmitted even if someone with HIV coughs or sneezes directly in your face or onto your food. If it were that easy to pass along HIV, the number of people living with the virus today would probably be in the billions, not the millions.

8. Chewing Gum

Whether it's merely touching an old piece of chewed-up gum or transferring a wad of it from your HIV-positive friend's mouth to yours, gum does not represent an HIV risk. HIV is not transmitted through saliva; this is why you can also share food, drinks or utensils with HIV-positive people and not worry about becoming infected.

7. Mosquito Bites

What if a mosquito bites an HIV-positive person and then feasts on you? If a mosquito can transmit malaria, it can transmit HIV too, right? Wrong! Malaria is a very different kind of disease than HIV.
Even if HIV could survive long enough in the extracted blood, there would be so little HIV in there that you'd have no risk of being infected by it if you were the mosquito's next victim -- even if you squashed that sucker on your arm, blood-filled stomach and all.

6. Public Restrooms

Did you forget to put down toilet paper on the seat before using the potty? No need to run out for an HIV test.
Even if a disgusting bodily fluid left on the seat were somehow able to get into your bloodstream (which is virtually impossible as it is -- and no, "up-splashing" does not put you at risk either), the HIV within that fluid wouldn't survive long enough outside of the body to harm you. Not only that, but there wouldn't be enough HIV in that small amount of fluid to pose an infection risk.

5. Eating at a Restaurant

For some reason, restaurants make the imagination run wild. People write in with an endless string of scenarios, including a chef's accidental slip of the knife, a waitress with a scratch on her hand, and a piece of food that briefly fell off someone's plate and touched the table.
But here are the facts: In all of those infectious fantasies, there simply wouldn't be enough HIV present to pose a risk. (In most of them, there's zero chance that HIV would be present at all.) In addition, HIV doesn't live long enough outside of the body for any restaurant scenario to carry a risk -- that is, unless you run off and have unprotected sex with the waiter.

4. Getting a Lap Dance

Oh, if only we had a dollar tucked in our G-string for every person who's written in after a visit to a strip club. (And it's not solely the clients who fear the wrath of the lap!) Lap dances -- and most other strip club encounters -- bear absolutely no risk for one huge reason: at least one of you is wearing clothing on top of your happy parts, and no bodily fluids are being exchanged. (Even if you think you felt a little bit of wetness on your skin, that doesn't count as "exchanging fluids.")
With no opportunity for an exchange of bodily fluids, there is nothing to fear.

3. Sharing a Drinking Glass

Pure and simple: Saliva is not one of the four bodily fluids that can transmit the virus. That list is reserved for blood, semen, vaginal secretions and breast milk. So unless you were drinking a large, frothy glass of any of those, you have nothing to worry about.

2. Shaking Hands

Shaking hands is considered "casual contact" and absolutely does not put you at risk for contracting HIV. It doesn't matter if the shaking involved hands (yours, theirs or both) that were peeling, sweaty, dirty, or had cuts on them.
The same goes for other common concerns, such as hugging someone, being scratched or even being bitten (unless the bite is very deep, meaning it went all the way through your skin -- and even then, any potential risk would be extremely small).

1. Kissing

Of all the issues our experts are asked about, none is the source of more unwarranted freak-outs than kissing. The act of kissing on its own carries no risk for HIV. It doesn't matter whether it's a peck on the cheek or deep tongue-on-tongue action. (And no, you can't transmit HIV through cold sores.)
The only kissing scenario that would involve even a remote risk would be where fresh blood was exchanged -- and unless you're dating a vampire, that kind of thing is extremely unlikely to happen.

Was this article not enough to ease your fears? For more information, please visit our "Ask the Experts" Q&A forum or read this comprehensive fact sheet.



Once again I did not write this article and in no way do I wish to take credit for it. This is solely to educate the less educated.

I hoped you enjoy and can breathe now. I will go back to watching Dawson's Creek. I know, pretty lame for a Saturday night right? Well I don't feel like leaving the comfort of my warm bed/room/apt.

Good Night and remember whatever you do, it's okay to kiss a random stranger tonight, unless he turns out to be a serial killer and then you are on your own. HA HA!

Niters.
Sleepless

The Last Year: 365 1/4

It's been a whole year since I started this blog and I have to say the last year was perfect. I think the last year seems like how life should be.

I have never been more confused in my life,  yet more determined to see my dreams through.
I have never lost so many friends, yet somehow becoming closer to the few that matters.
I have never seen so many different sides to a person,  yet finding the qualities worth keeping.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN MORE CONFUSED,  BUT YET SO SURE ABOUT WHAT I NEED FROM LIFE.

I have gotten so many job offers this year,  but somehow managed to settle into a familiar place.
I said goodbye to old roommates and welcome new ones that seems to fall right into place.
I said goodbye to old lovers, met new ones but somehow realized that this journey, that I am on,  I must go alone.

There have been a few regrets but they only motivates me!

For the first time in my life I know what it is I truly want.
I know which career path I will choose.
I know where I want to live.
I know what it is I want in a guy.

I now live to not compromise my morals and integrity.

So why do I feel so far away from it all? This is a strange feeling,  one that I DON'T KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN, but one that I am excited about. I feel like I finally hit the fork in the road at the crossroad, you know when you're stuck between a rock and a hard place? I have this overwhelming feeling that this is it and that everything is gonna fall into place right after this moment. There are these butterflies in my belly that I can't explain. It's a constant feeling of wanting to smile all day with this great dread. I feel relaxed and anxious. I can't seem to get rid of the butterflies. I don't want them to stop. I love the feeling of not knowing what's next.

I love it all. WISH ME LUCK.

I feel like this whole year, if it didn't teach  me much, it taught me how to let go and move on.
It taught me how to forgive and forget.
It taught  me that not every battle is mine to fight and that sometimes my place is in the bleachers cheering everyone else on.
It taught me to look at moments like these and enjoy them and not having to analyze them.
It taught me peace.

I am now living for myself and not vicariously through everyone's perception of me.
I am happy!

So whats next you might ask?

Life as it pertains to me.........

P.s. my computer was harmed in the making of this blog. LOL!
Niters!

And don't let the bed bugs bite!
Sleepless.