What a diffrence a day makes.....

Woke up yesterday morning to the screams of my roommate, I went to the kitchen and the kitchen ceiling caved in and water everywhere. I tried to get someone to cover my shift but that was to no end so I went to work. Only to find out that the basement at my job was overflowing with water from a busted pipe. Ummm...is this a trend? Then I got some bad news about a certain situation, which I will not go into at this time, but all I know is that  a certain someone is A BITCH!!!!. (And that Karma is already knocking on her door and she has done too many wrongs so she is afraid to look out the window...Open the door BITCH!). Made no money last night or better yet as much as I would have wanted to break even...sucks!!! Then around 12:20 am, I discovered that my keys to the restaurant and my apartment were all the way in Harlem.( Long story actually its shorter than you think but I dont wanna go into it). Now I am not that concerned about the restaurant coz lets face it, the manager and owner lives a few blocks away and will be there in a second to protect whats important. I was more concerned about my keys to my home and how I would get in seeing as though none of my roommates where home. Luckily one of my roommates were in the area and I could get her keys to get in. This cost me a $12 cab fare ride which I ONLY tip the poor bastard coz I felt bad for him to be driving me around. (he was very grateful). I finally got home to find that the roof in the kitchen was fixed but there is another spot that is starting to leak. WTF???? I think our landlord should comp our rent for the next two months for the inconvenience, I'm just saying. And with all that happened that day I was finally safe in my bed and ready to pass out when I found a bump in my nose....JUST HORRIBLE!!! Oh and today I woke up and its snowing.....just great!!! January you are not a friend of mine. I hope February will be kinder. 

The Mission is possible

So my birthday is coming up in 2 months and I need a date for it. I mean a girl can wish right. I have been choosing the wrong guys for myself and no matter how hard I try I always seem to end up with the same type of guys. The mamas boys who always tend to be emotionally unavailable, or just liars even though I specifically tell each guy on the first date that I want the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me God. Yep never seems to happen. I think I have an invisible stamp on my forehead that says lie to me why dontcha. I cant seem to find  it. Anyways so back on track. I have decided (and solely for your reading purpose only, and not the fact that I am desperate to explore this city with an emotionally available hot man) to let you guys fix me up on blind dates, and in the whole sense of not trying to be selfish I will blog about the dates so you guys can live vicariously through me. I seriously don't know what it is that I am getting myself into. I like adventure so I know this will be fun and hopefully a date for my Birthday!!!! March 23.

I am doing this the "old fashion" way and I have never been on a blind date before so I think now would be a great time....
So here's the idea. I have no preference, color, race, religion or creed. If he is A straight male between the age of 32-40 and is emotionally available and would like to go on a date with me bring it on. I would like the concept of meeting for the first time on the date. I would also like to explore the city and not stay in my comfort zone, so if you know a great guy who likes to have fun and will be around for the 23rd of March 2011, let me know. Set the date up. I am available for dates Thursdays only ( I have a busy schedule and Thursdays will be the only time I will have available. SO HELP A SISTA OUT!!!! Bring on the boys.......
Yours Trully,
Taniesha

Another year, oops! Im older...

So this is twenty eleven...damn! man when did it get to the double digits and why do I still have the urge to say welcome to 2009? This year started off fuzzy but kinda exciting and kinda feeling like great things are about to happen. I mean I am left of the middle to whatever it is that I should have been doing or should have accomplished by now, but I feel alright. I feel kinda crazy and sane at the same time. I feel like I need to be in complete isolation and really not even seeing people outside my job. Then at the same time I miss my old friends and is shying away from meeting new ones. I feel like the ones I use to love I don't have much in common with anymore and the things I use to need I don't remember. So I'm about to be 32 in 2months and a week and why not celebrate that like its everyday? There's so many things I want to do for this year and I want to be wide awake for them. GONE are the days when I am too lazy to think and feel, to show emotions as to how I am feeling. I am sick of those days. I feel human-less and that's not how I want to spend this year. I want to be human again. I think this is the first time in my lifetime I have decided to make resolutions for a year. I think, before, I was too afraid of setting goals like the rest of you human beings. I didn't want to be so cliche, frankly I didn't want to associate myself with the norm. I am still not comfortable being around you normal folks but I also have decided to give you guys a chance. I mean how bad can you be? You seem to be functioning fine with your 9-5 jobs, and your fancy clothes, and the boring social circles of always trying to fit in, always going to the gym to loose that pound or two that is so destined to stay with you for the rest of your life, and I say try eating for a change and stop worrying about the weight you gain. Better yet STOP telling me about it. Oh yea so I will try it the normal way for at least as long as I can endure. It may or may not be for the rest of the year. SHOOT I'm just gonna promise until the end of the month. So let the new year begins and if you don't really understand what it is that you are reading, rest assure you are not alone. This is the ramblings of a tired bartender who wishes the economy would pick up already so people can spend more and I can once again work less.....Happy New Year you suckers!!!

Happy Hour at Thursdays....

It took me a while to get back to this place, but I am here and I am happy. It is before the beginning of a new year.

Life can be so scary, happy, sad, hopeful and lonely at times. It can be a bunch of nothing and at the same time a bunch of everything. I realized this as I was stuck in traffic in a cab heading to W48 17th st. It's just so simple, as everyone was waiting for me and me being late as usual. I mean I am always late and let's face it, sometimes I am late because I don't have the patience to wait for everyone else (oops secrets out), But most of the time I am late because I can't get myself out of the house.
But Thursday for some reason I was late and was really annoyed with myself because I somehow wanted to be nowhere else, but with my friends and certainly not stuck in traffic, on the FDR, listening to my cab driver telling me about the Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center! No I would rather be chilling for happy hour, drinking red wine and chatting!....Anyways as I drowned out the sounds of the chatty cabby and watch the NYC skyline, I somehow reminded myself of why I am alive and why this journey has brought me to this.

I know it's weird but this year, unlike many of the other years, has gone by so quickly and I can't remember a single thing that I have done besides working and sleeping, and it made me kinda sad to know that 2010 will only be remembered by that, oh yea and the constant whining about a stupid "relationship" that was D.O.A. to begin with. Urgh!!!

So I let all that go and as I was just sitting in the back of the cab I began to smile and I think this was probably one of the best smiles I had smiled all year, and someone as in the form of something told me it was gonna be a good night, or maybe that stupid song was on the radio. Either way I was happy and when I finally met up with my friends it was the best evening yet.

The wine was great, my friends were all smiling, the braised beef short ribs was fantastically delicious, the dancing at the gay club was superb ( I danced as if I was still in college and thought life was just plain fun), the night wasn't as cold as the other ones and the hot sauce that I added to the cup of noddles (yes I still eat them at the end of every great night) was just as amazing as the night itself. The lips (though quite not attached to the body I had hoped for) was the beginning of other things to come!

Someone told me 2 days prior that the body does what the mind tells it. I am starting to fully understand the concept. And to be told today that I am always chippy, but that I seemed a lot "chippier" is a great compliment….

…….So as I welcome 2011, I made a resolution and it's a resolution that I really hope I will keep. This is to coin Thursdays as HAPPY HOUR THURSDAYS, and this I look forward to in hopes of sharing this with Daphnee!!

Here's to Thursday and every one there after!!!

Happy Holidays!!!!

As 2010 will have it,
Sleepless

I hate it when....

Now I'm sure we all have been through this time and time again.. These are situations I'm sure we get caught in  and we just sit there in shock and wonder how the fuck we got stuck. I decided to go through my days and make a list of all the shitty things ppl do to me daily, weekly, monthly or yearly and to keep them in mind, so I will never be caught off guard again.

1. I hate it when ppl interrupt me while eating. I really dont think anything that you have to tell me, that doesnt included any serious matter with my family or close friends, is worth me not eating.

2. I hate it when ppl assume they know you "well" even if they've only known you for a year or less, and they tell everyone things about you that happen in that time frame(year or less), as if to say that's all you. (shut the fuck up).

3. I hate it when ppl pick their teeth in front of me. Thats what a restroom is there for. (1001 ways to gross me out).

4.I hate drunk ppl. (I think im allowed to say that and I mean the ones who sit at your bar all evening and leaves a shitty tip. I mean the least you can do for me is to pay me to listen to your crap. you dont see me coming to your job and talking your ear off.

5. I want to stab extremely happy ppl in the neck with a dull pencil,one that is not sharp enough so I have to do it three times.

6. Boys who like to grab asses in clubs, bars or any where for that matter should DIE. I am very ashamed of your mothers.

7. Crying babies and obnoxious toddlers should be banned from going into public places.

8.Anyone who thinks all babies are cute.

9. I hate ppl who wont shut the fuck up. Yea just stop talking and breathe.

10. I hate bouncers or doormen. They think inside their shitty club or bar is a private heaven.

11. I HATE CHASE BANK.

12. I hate parents of crying babies or toddlers who are immune to their childrens behavior in  public..Please stay home with them.
to be continued....

There's so many things I want to say to you, but i'll just say goodbye......

Ok so Polona is coming to visit me in less than a month. This gave me the best idea in the world. To go on a 30 day cleanse. One month, (which I had already started) until the 24th of December 2010. Right in time for xmas and new years. I Taniesha Brown will not drink any form of alcoholic beverages and I will HOPE not be engaging in any smoking of the cigarettes. This is in hopes, of helping me, quit smoking. I really wanna do it before the new year begins and instead of making it a resolution I am gonna break it before 2011. So now I challenge myself into doing other things. Already I have picked up on the craft of being up in the morning and having breakfast. Eggs are always yummy and a great way to start the day. So no complaints there. I already found another job and so that's groovy. Umm lets see... I will wait for Polona to get here so I can indulge in the city as a reborn tourist. So Let the challenge begin, man I cant even believe its not even December yet. I have done this so many times but I now sucks coz I work in the business of drinking and smoking. They go hand in hand. But as I think about relapsing I will think about my health, for my kids and my kid's kids. I know I dont have any "yet" but one day I would like to be healthy for them. So in the mean time I will make them this promise. I know its gonna feel great after all. So christmas is a coming and the geese is getting fat!! Happy Holidays y'all.
off to bed!

A cause I hold dear to my heart

http://www.blackaids.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=678%3Ai-am-hiv-positive&catid=53%3Anews-2010&Itemid=120. This is such a powerful article and its one of the first that has been written to date. I read a lot about HIV and I try my best to help when I can. One of my favorite groups on facebook is Greater than AIDS. This is a positive(no pun) group that is very reassuring to the human race. I myself has been tested negative but I think that as long as we are living and is sexually active, theres no telling as to where, how and why this virus will strike. I say we can preach as much as we want to practice safe sex, but the reality of the situation is that we are human beings and theres no telling how a person react to a certain sexual situation. I urge us all though that we have to take our own sexual self in our own hands and be more vocal as to what it is that we want from our partners and in return do the same. Please check out Greater Than AIDS on facebook and become a member of the group. Remember the life you save could be your own.
Good afternoon. Finally I got some sleep last night....I know it wont be for long though!

Feed mawga dwag, dem tun round bite yu!!!!

Speak the truth and speak it well cause it what it will. He who hides the wrong he does, does the wrong things still. I vow to live my life as honest as possible, this way, on any given day, you can always find me with the truth. I find that not only is it a great exercise for the mind but also a great way for self growth. I find mostly these days I am getting two versions of ppl. The things they say and the things they do.(Sum wi eat aah drink wid yu aah behind dem sussuh pan yu, mi seh mi throw mi corn, mi nuh caal no fowl). To each his own. But always keep this in mind, If you live in a glass house don't throw stone.. Ha ha ha just getting a revelation here. Sometimes my A.D.D minds wonders into things that always, down the road, come true. Sometimes life gives you lemons, as in the form of everyday ppl, but thankfully this is just a way to weed out the vines to get to the roses. But hey on a lighter note, the eyes are truly the windows to the soul. So the next time you meet someone, look them dead in the eye for five (5) seconds. The reaction they give will reveal the true inner being. A lil thing I picked up along this journey of life. And this too shall pass!

My job makes your job look like dark chocolate on a hot day (poop).

So as funny as it seems my new job is awesome. Yea I work somewhere else too. Anyways the night started off as such, with not much to do and then it picked up. Luckily, coz I was starting to think that my bed was sounding better. So these lovely ppl came and sat in front of me. They were very nice and very sweet. They were all paired off. Three girls and three guys, so much so that at one point all of them were making out. I mean I'm sure its every bartenders dream to have ppl just making out in front of us (not). Its weird coz its always at the service station. Anyways they were doing great dancing and singing having a great time, drinking. There was this one couple who seemed to be very much into each other. ( I will now call them Sally and Ian) This was going on to the point were they were making out and Sally was standing up on the bar stool ( I guess coz she wanted to give Ian the full length of her tongue). The bouncer had to come over and tell Sally that the bar stool is for sitting only. Ha ha ha ha. To which at that point Ian gave me a look as if to say "what is wrong with Sally"? I shrugged it off coz you know, they were loving. I mean I didn't mind them, they were drinking and Ian even though British was tipping me quite lovely, so yea they coulda stayed and make out the whole night. Now the plot thickens, I came back from the kitchen only to find Sally with an OMG! look on her face and Ian was no where to be found and the other dude was like "no way" and sally was like "yea dude totally". So I said umm is there something I can do to help and Sally was like "You know that guy that I was here with? He totally left me in BK". I was like that's not possible he is probably outside smoking and she was like "nuh-uh he doesn't.  He just said to me that its late and he has to be up early and he has to go (this of course in his cute British accent). Omg its like our first date"!. I was like hold on a sec, you were on a first date, tonight, like literally right this minute with Ian? Sally said "yes we were out for like six hours tonight" and she responded saying the worst part about it was that "I was kinda gonna have sex with him tonight". This, still with the OMG look on her face!!! I couldn't helped but laugh, the other guy couldn't helped but laugh. He later pulled me aside and proclaimed that he wasn't in any way calling her a ho, but that statement was priceless. Ha ha ha ha. So Sally was bewildered, her lil friend (I will call Jen) was pissed. She actually went outside to cuss him (Ian) out. Ha ha OK, the rational person I am, I had to look at both sides of the story. I mean I wasn't quick to call Ian an asshole (even though he did an asshole thing) But Sally should know better, come on she is 26 ( and according to her "I am too old for this shit"). OK so the icing on the cake came in the form of a Text message sent from Ian (33) to Sally  stating that "he (Ian) didn't appreciate her friend (Jen) coming outside to cuss him out and threaten to "punch him in his face" after he had already said goodbye to everyone. Also these are not the type of ppl he wants to be around. Ha ha ha ha, at that point I was really cracking up and thinking I was gonna be punked or something to the sort. But there was no Ashton and  the crew. OK now Sally turned to me and said "Is White Castle still open" So I said yes its 24hrs. Sally Hi-fived her friend Jen(who cussed out the guy) and said yes I am so hungry and he didn't even take me to dinner. At that point I had to leave parting words with Sally. I said sweetie come on you should know next time that if you agree to a date then it should involve dinner and please don't make out with someone until the second date, and this should ONLY apply to you.They left with Sally saying " I can't wait for tomorrow to tell my bestie all about my night and of course to respond to the text from Ian (because I am too tired and drunk and hungry right now)".

P.s nobody's real names were used in the making of this blog. I don't know these ppl I saw them for the first time tonight. I only hoped to God they (Sally and Ian) didn't meet online. Sally went on that night to get her some White Castle and Ian went home that night to a different girl waiting for him in his bed. Jen danced the night away and is still swearing that she didn't threatened Ian. Jen boy is still laughing about the events of the night and cant wait to wake up in the morning to tell his friends about Jen's whoring friend. I was satisfied because they tipped me well and I got a blog to write from them. Ha ha ha ha.
Off to zzzzzzzzzzz

The best part of breaking up, finding someone else you cant get enough of?

Quitting anything is very hard.

So hard,  that in most cases,  you have to always find something else to pass the time or just to get you through it.

My fate, is almost always bigger than me.

I need to quit and it's so hard.

I will, however,  asked myself a few things to see if that helps.

When is the best time to quit?

Does it depends on what you're quitting?
Or just making up the mind to sticking to quitting will be enough?..

I, for one,  hate a quitter.
I think it's the easiest form of giving up.

Somethings in life are worth quitting though.

A bad job, A Stressful Relationship, A Cheating Boyfriend and yes SMOKING. (Yep it's the killer, the Hardest of the HARDS).

I have been wanting to for quite sometimes.
Been dreaming about it, been seeing myself doing it,  but somehow I ALWAYS ended up, in my window, enjoying the peace and quite and enjoying the comfort that, nothing seem to give me the pleasure, but a cigarette.

I am actually one of those unfortunate people who happens to love smoking cigarette for the worst possible reason.

For the comfort of the chemicals.

I enjoy it!

Wish I had a cigarette right now!

Anyways, so the countdown begins once again.  I have to quit this time, even if just for the pure sanity of saving myself, saving myself every two days from spending $13.25, on a pack of something that is clearly no good for me.

So in quitting cigarettes,  I am taking up cooking (when one door closes).

So day one is over and I think I've eaten everything I could possible find today. That and making a midnight run to the bodega, but for once, this time it wasn't to buy cigarettes it was to get more snacks to munch on.

God, I even sound nicotine deprived...

You know what?  Forget cooking.

I'm gonna try speed dating.

Ha!

Of course that is not me ,OFF to get some smokes
Shit!

I meant zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

As sleeplessers do,

Sleepless